You know you’re a mum when……….
– Remember when you used to be able to just go out of the house in a morning in the space of about 5 minutes flat? Yes? Well, forget that.
You know you’re a mum when it takes about 3 hours just to round them up to go the local corner shop.
They’ll need a wee, or a drink, or lie flat out on the floor like a piece of stiff cardboard so they don’t have to put their coats on.
Or when they were really small, you had to stop the pushchair every 5 minutes to retrieve flying socks that they’d pulled off their feet or hats off their head.
– No more trying to go to sleep in the car. Instead you’re trying to keep them from killing each other in the back by playing games to amuse them, such as the ‘Numberplate Game,’ ‘See who can spot a red car first’ game, or the ‘Find something from every letter of the alphabet game.’
– Instead of having a nice tidy living room floor, you find yourself nearly breaking your neck on stray Match Attax tins or toy cars lying on the floor.
– You find yourself saying such gems as:
“I don’t give a flying fig what little Johnny in your class does. If little Johnny flung himself off a cliff, would you follow him?!”
– You’re looking forward to a night out for ages. Whoohoo, no kids for a weekend! You can hardly wait. Then when it comes, they’ve been gone about 5 minutes and you’re missing them already.
Yep, that’s being a mum for you!
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