I’ve always loved reading, and one of my all time favourite authors when I was small was the brilliant Roald Dahl.
Whereas other people wrote about adventures, fairies, or nice and fluffy things, Roald had a darker, more scary side.
From giants stealing sleeping children out of their beds and eating them up (then leaving a pile of bones underneath the window sill), to little girls getting trapped in paintings and never being able to get out – whilst living their life in the constraints of the picture frame instead, there was always some sinister elements to his tales.
So, in celebration of Roald Dahl Day, here’s 5 lessons from Roald Dahl.
Treat animals and birds the way you would want to be treated yourself
Oh, what fun, going out shooting ducks as a family! Bet you wouldn’t find it half as much fun though if the tables were turned and you woke up one morning and you’d traded places, would you?!
How would YOU like it if it was now the ducks who lived in your house, and you were tiny people with wings forced to build nests and dodge the bullets?
Not so much fun now, is it?!
The family in The Magic Finger found this out pretty quickly. Treat others as you’d like to be treated yourself, as you never know when it might turn round and get you instead…
Don’t be a spoilt little brat
I’m sure all kids have their moments, and stamp their feet when they don’t get their own way.
Charlie and the Chocolate Factory had a monumental brat in the shape of Veruca Salt.
“I want an Oompa Loompa NOW, Daddy!”
What happens to the children who are perpetually spoilt though? Always wanting more, and never appreciating what they have?
Yup. They end up in the garbage chute where they belong.
Don’t p*ss off the grandkids
Are you a cantankerous old lady with a mouth like a dog’s bottom? Let’s hope you don’t have a grandson like George then, or he might make you some of his marvellous (or not so marvellous) medicine.
Hide the hair cream. The bleach. The toothpaste. Anything the cheeky little upstart could try and mix up for you and pass off as medicine.
A lesson to remember in future…..
kids – washing too much is bad for you
One of the lessons I’m sure most soap dodging kids are the most delighted to hear. I mean, you don’t want too many baths, do you?
If you have too many baths then the witches can smell you more easily. Leave the dirt on, as freshly washed children smell of dogs droppings….
parents aren’t just parents, you know…
What do you mean, parents aren’t just parents? Surely their sole purpose is to be there for the child, watch endless Cbeebies with you and whatnot – they came into the world as ready made parents without having a life of their own first, right?!
Something that Danny in Danny the Champion of The World found out when his Dad disappeared in the dead of the night and he found out he’d been sneaking out to poach pheasants…..
So much wisdom.
So much fun.
Tell us via the comments if you’ve got any more lessons to add….